We are hard wired for fear
Fear comes from our deep unconscious and overrides rationality.
I know that statistcally riding a roller coaster or fairground ride is much much safer than riding a horse. Yet I love riding horses and am terrified of fairground rides. The deep reason? I’m not in control on a roller coaster.
For primitive mankind fear was very important. It was the warning from the unconscious or higher conscious that something dangerous and hungry lurked down that particular forest trail. Trust your instincts.
Gandalf in Moria said “I do not like the feel of the middle way; and I do not like the smell of the left hand way: there is foul air down there, or I am no guide. I shall take the right hand passage.”
It is still very true today, if something you have been asked to do doesn’t feel right it probably isn’t right. But we have been trained to ignore these feelings and rationalise the action. When it all goes pear shaped we say: I thought it wouldn’t work out.
That begs the question, if you thought it wouldn’t work out, why did you do it? Rationalisation? Peer pressure?
Deep unconscious fear does one of two things to us: stops us doing a thing or attracts failure when we do do it. Yet these days when we are dealing with people, and being an entrepreneur, or a writer, or artist, the fear is unfounded. There is no actual reason that our enterprise should go wrong provided we have the skills and the talent required. Our deep unacknowledged fear causes us to do things that sabotage our work.
I sat down at the computer to write this article having had the ideas and words buzzing round my head since I woke up. I had got myself tea and toast which was still a delaying tacitic even though fairly necessary, but then at the laptop I opened a GAME not Word! Am I aware of being afraid to write? To speak my truth in public? Not on a conscious level, but my actions prove that I have a deep fear of success. And that fear is so deep I only realised it as I wrote that sentence! I have been asked before if I had a fear of failure or a fear of success and I have not been able to answer.
The catalyst for writing this article was a particular person I know via Facebook and a shared interest. She is quite well known and successful in her field and has written a couple of books on her subject. Things go wrong in her life. Heck – things go wrong in everyone’s life! But when they do she has a habit of posting on FB things like “why does the Universe always do this to me?” and “will my luck ever change?”. Now I know that this lady has an awful lot of good things in her life and I know that a lot of the time she posts about those good things as well. But her perception is that she is plagued by bad luck.
And this is where we come to the Law of Attraction. We live in a vibrational Universe. All matter is energy in vibration. The Law of Attraction is a fundamental law that whatever vibration we put out we attract back… but what is little understood is that the vibration that we put out is controlled by our emotions not out thinking. Emotions are much more difficult to control. Fear is a very primeval emotion that we need(ed) to keep us safe. We fear being different, stepping away from the crowd, being outside the norm, because if we are ostracised from the tribe the lions and tigers and bears (oh my!) will get us.
So for the person who believes they have continual bad luck it goes like this…
They start something new, but have a deep and maybe unrecognised fear about doing it. The fear attracts failure. The failure ‘proves’ their fear was founded. Next time they do something a little outside the norm the fear is a bit bigger, no matter how strong their desire to accomplish the task is. Fear is stronger than desire. Something goes wrong. Hiccoughs along the way. There may be success but not without problems. These failures and little issues compound the belief that they can ‘never get it right’, that they never have any luck, that The Universe is against them. Because belief is a thought you keep thinking, and ego wants to prove your beliefs right, so ego makes you notice all the little issues and problems until they become one big problem and an acknowledged belief that they are an unlucky person, or that the world is a dangerous place, or that Network Marketing is a scam, or all car mechanics are rip off merchants. Then, because they have that belief it is reflected in their emotions, which puts out the vibration to the Universe, and attracts like to like. When they have to have their car fixed they worry that the garage will cheat them, so they manage to chose a garage that is run by a less than honest mechanic. They attracted the bad mechanic, and proved themselves right. They never knew that they themselves did it. They continue to believe that it was all outside circumstances.
Many of us experience fear when it comes to money. This is because in the modern age we really do not have to worry about many physical dangers, but our survival is dependent on having sufficient money or income. Even people who have a large income can still be fearful that the situation will not continue. This is why there are people who gain a lot of money, lose it (spend it) , broke for a while, get more, spend it, broke, get more in a repeating pattern. And the fact that they have periods of being broke reinforces their belief that being financially comfortable is difficult, and reinforces their fear that their income will dry up.
In the UK today the benefits system is designed to create fear, because they can and will stop people’s income at the drop of a hat for no apparent reason, so people who depend on benefits are loath to do things that might eventually take them off benefits, like starting their own business, because the system is designed to make it difficult. When people are fearful they can be controlled.
Whether the fear is justified or not, it still debilitates people.
There are ways to conquer this fear. First we need to recognise that it is there. Consider your emotions when you think about income or your health or anything that worries you. Do you hesitate to open ‘official’ mail or check your bank account? Do you worry that at some point in the future there won’t be enough? Fear is more than worry, it is a feeling in the pit of the stomach. A feeling that maybe you never admit to to any other people? This has been my fear around money. Real and visceral.
You cannot prevent it coming. You can send it away. Start by denying it. When you feel it say “NO! I deny this fear. It is not my fear.” Say it aloud if you can. Take several deep breaths and bring your attention to something that makes you feel good. Focus your attention on feeling good. The only way you can stop thinking about something you do not want is to make the effort to think about something you do want.
Don’t think about a pink elephant…..see, that image immediately came to your mind. You can’t stop thinking about it until you replace the thought with something else.
When the visceral fear has subsided say some affirmations.
“Today I have everything that I need.”
“I am prosperous”
“Money flows easily into my life”
“I am healthy, wealthy and strong”
There are many, find one that feels good to you. A good resource is Louise L Hay
EFT – tapping – is something that is good to do to release fears.
The big lesson here is that fear makes you focus on the thing that you fear.
Your focus is your vibration.
Your vibration attracts like unto itself.
When you fear you attract the very thing you are afraifd of.
Understand this. Recognise your trigers. Work on getting rid of those fears.
Next article ….. ways to release deep fears….